I do want to thank Jason, and everyone at the Monastery again for welcoming me with such openness. I’m still amazed that I was granted this opportunity to see shining samples of the teachings of a course in miracles acim, and fo the very first time in a lengthy while, I do not feel alone.
Part of me wanted to keep longer, but beneath that desire was the thought that I would be doing this for the wrong reason; as an easy way to prevent my problems. The stronger feeling was, and is, that my travels will continue.
Before I left, Jason asked if I had had any insights. What I’m about to fairly share was not yet clear in those days; only on the drive away made it happen coalesce.
That morning, several lines from the Vance Joy song kept running through my head, “I never should have told you, never should have allow you to see inside. Don’t are interested troubling your mind, won’t you allow it be?” This confused me as I could not think of something that I had stated that I felt regret for.
Eventually, the phrase, “don’t are interested troubling your mind” stood out. This reminded me that probably the most prominent fear I had in visiting the Monastery was that I would somehow interfere with its residents’peace of mind, by just my presence alone. This belief that I could negatively affect other people’s state of mind has been with me for many years, and has colored many of my past experiences and relationships.
This fear left my awareness immediately after I arrived. On the drive away it rose again, but I remembered David saying in one of is own videos that minds cannot attack. I cried and laughed, and now feel like the belief is being (has been?) released.
You can find other things that happened that felt important, but I can’t think of them right now.
